Fall seems to be upon us. It is only early September, but you can feel the crispness to the air and the feeling that the autumnal equinox is upon us. While I love summer and swimming and shorts and tank tops, I always end up looking forward to fall every year. Kids go back to school, excitement for what classes they have. Marching band is on our schedules this year at the Frye house, and i couldn't be more excited for Cameron. I think we may have finally found his passion. Music. Which happened to also be mine and Shane's passions as well in high school. Even now we love music so much. It is just a part of our lives. We are always singing, or playing an instrument. Love music.
Fall brings thankfulness at Thanksgiving time. This year, since I am finally rooted into my own home, I can decorate for seasons. I enjoy changing colors and getting the pumpkins and the fall leaves and all things fall out to decorate with. It has been many years since I have been able to do this.
Leaves fall onto the ground, fireplaces crackle, outside weiner roasts start. It's the time of year that people get settled in for the winter. Hats and coats come out of the closet, dust shaken off of the pants and sweatshirts. Flip flops are traded in for sneakers or boots. It's a transitional time.
My thoughts come back to my own life. Fall is transitional, and what transition will I be making this fall? It has been a year since we left our old church (the second time) and moved on to College Park. Will there be another transition this fall? Or will we stay where it is comfy and quiet and let God just wash over us while we are just being? There are so many times I feel the nudge to move to a smaller church and get involved again, but am scared. I am afraid to put myself out there and go through that all over again. It takes a lot to put myself out there in front of the world. Am I ready yet? Or should I just sit back and enjoy the music at College Park? The sermons are wonderful. I can be anonymous there. I am not Kristian the singer, or Kristian the piano player, or Kristian the children's ministry teacher, or Kristian the youth group helper. I can just be Kristian. I kind of like it that way for now.
maybe the transition this fall will be that I enjoy the quiet and just sit back and relax and not worry about it. Just love God and what He has in store for us and just let it go. He will take us where He wants us in time. maybe this fall, maybe not. Doesn't matter, all I know is that He is the only one that knows when that transition will happen and I am okay with that.
"Lord, love us. Heal us. Keep washing over us with your holy spirit. I am looking up and closing my eyes and worshiping you. Flood my heart with your neverending love and forgiveness." Amen
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Friday, June 17, 2011
Williamsburg, VA trip Days 3-5
A whirlwind of history! I love it here! SO much rich history here in Virginia.
Day 3- We arrived in Williamsburg, after driving by Monicello on our way here, but we didn't go on the tour as there wasn't enough time. We arrived and basically checked into our hotel and chilled the rest of the day.
Day4-Jamestown. We went to Jamestown Settlement on Thursday. It was a lovely day and we spent it looking around at the settlement and seeing them doing an archaeological dig. It was awesome!
Later in the afternoon, we stopped by a Salt Spa. This was a place that had drug several tons of Polish salt from Poland over here that is therapeutic. It is heated and produces negative ions, which I guess your body doesn't get enough of. Anyway, it is supposed to relax you and help with allergies, asthma, etc. We went it. If you now me at all, you know I do not sit still at all and find it very difficult to not fidget. I was a little nervous that I woudl be a pest to the 6 other people in there, including Cameron and my grams and pap. It was 45 minutes of sitting in a gravity chair with a blanket and it was quiet and there was soft music playing. It was comfy and nice. However, everyone else is falling asleep and I don't do 45 minute naps. Therefore, I stayed up. After about 5 minutes, I started to fidget, but remembered I had a book in my purse, so I sat there and read. It was nice. I have horrible allergies and within 5 minutes, I was able to breathe out of my nose with no clogs. I can't honestly remember the last time I was able to do that.
Day 5- Colonial Williamsburg
We set out to the 1770's this morning. It was a sunny hot day and we were ready for some more history! It was great. The downtown of Colonial Williamsburg was quaint and full of buildings that were from the time period. They had actors dressed in that time period clothing and all the people that worked there were as well. They had re-enactments. They had horses. They had it all. I was in love! I was so excited to see all the history of the town and hear about the Revolutionary War time period. We especially liked the Governor's Palace. It was neat. We also went into the cellars at the palace. It was dark and creepy and felt weird down there. Yikes!
We went to the Chowning's Tavern for lunch and it was nice and yummy! It was all around a great day!
Tomorrow, we are heading to Yorktown, then we are headed toward home. We are planning on stopping at Mt. Vernon on our way home on Sunday and then home on Monday! Whew! What a fun exciting vacation!
Day 3- We arrived in Williamsburg, after driving by Monicello on our way here, but we didn't go on the tour as there wasn't enough time. We arrived and basically checked into our hotel and chilled the rest of the day.
Day4-Jamestown. We went to Jamestown Settlement on Thursday. It was a lovely day and we spent it looking around at the settlement and seeing them doing an archaeological dig. It was awesome!
Later in the afternoon, we stopped by a Salt Spa. This was a place that had drug several tons of Polish salt from Poland over here that is therapeutic. It is heated and produces negative ions, which I guess your body doesn't get enough of. Anyway, it is supposed to relax you and help with allergies, asthma, etc. We went it. If you now me at all, you know I do not sit still at all and find it very difficult to not fidget. I was a little nervous that I woudl be a pest to the 6 other people in there, including Cameron and my grams and pap. It was 45 minutes of sitting in a gravity chair with a blanket and it was quiet and there was soft music playing. It was comfy and nice. However, everyone else is falling asleep and I don't do 45 minute naps. Therefore, I stayed up. After about 5 minutes, I started to fidget, but remembered I had a book in my purse, so I sat there and read. It was nice. I have horrible allergies and within 5 minutes, I was able to breathe out of my nose with no clogs. I can't honestly remember the last time I was able to do that.
Day 5- Colonial Williamsburg
We set out to the 1770's this morning. It was a sunny hot day and we were ready for some more history! It was great. The downtown of Colonial Williamsburg was quaint and full of buildings that were from the time period. They had actors dressed in that time period clothing and all the people that worked there were as well. They had re-enactments. They had horses. They had it all. I was in love! I was so excited to see all the history of the town and hear about the Revolutionary War time period. We especially liked the Governor's Palace. It was neat. We also went into the cellars at the palace. It was dark and creepy and felt weird down there. Yikes!
We went to the Chowning's Tavern for lunch and it was nice and yummy! It was all around a great day!
Tomorrow, we are heading to Yorktown, then we are headed toward home. We are planning on stopping at Mt. Vernon on our way home on Sunday and then home on Monday! Whew! What a fun exciting vacation!
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Williamsburg, VA trip Days 1 and 2
Cameron and I have had the pleasure of going on a historical trip with my grandparents to historic Williamsburg, VA. We are going to be traveling to different places on our trip, so I decided to blog about them a day or two at a time.
Day 1- traveled from Indiana to Beckley, WV. Nothing too exciting going on today.
Day2- Left Beckley and went to Staunton, VA. Here is a neat town. On our way to Staunton, we stopped at Greenbriar Resort in White Sulphur Springs, WV. My grandpa has mentioned this place before as a place that houses an underground bunker for government officials should something happen to the country where they would be safe. I must say, this seems a little farfetched, but if there was going to be a place for them to go, this would be ideal! It is tucked away in a little out in nowhere town in the mountains and hills. We went inside the resort to look around and take some pictures. If the government thing is incorrect, then there is lots of interesting information about this resort anyway! 26 presidents of the US have stayed here, as well as many celebrities. Frank Sinatra, Bob Hope, etc. It is beautiful and colorful and ritzy. I certainly didn't fit in there, but it was neat to go in and see how the rich live!! :)
After our trip to the Greenbriar, we got to Staunton. We went to the Frontier Museum, which is home of many old farmhouses from different countries. England, Ireland, Germany, Africa and America. Dating back from the 1600's, these homes were bought in their original countries and taken apart and brought across the ocean and put back together here. They have original wood, original windows in some of them, it is so neat! I love history, I love seeing living history.
On the grounds of the Frontier Museum is an abandoned, state owned sanitorium from many years ago. I had no idea what it was and asked one of the actors about it. Then got online and looked it up. Creepy!! Forced sterilizations were performed at this sanitorium when people were deemed mentally unstable and mentally incapable of having children. The sanitorium also housed mentally unstable children for a time. It is boarded up and the weeds are grown up around it, which only adds to the creepiness factor. I watched a video of some men going in it at night and running out scared when they heard screams (which I could hear on the video) and thumping noises (which I also heard) Yikes!!! Glad I am not staying there! But, we are staying right up the road less than a mile. Hope the ghosts stay away from here!! :)
Tomorrow, we are heading to Williamsburg. We are staying there 3 days and visiting Jamestown, Yorktown and Williamsburg. Then we are heading towards home and stopping by Mt. Vernon and coming up through Pennsylvania. I am definitely looking forward to seeing history of our country the rest of the week and I know Cameron is so excited because he loves Revolutionary War era history!! What a great vacation! We are so blessed to be able to come to places like this and see things like this. Thank you grams and pap for inviting us!
Day 1- traveled from Indiana to Beckley, WV. Nothing too exciting going on today.
Day2- Left Beckley and went to Staunton, VA. Here is a neat town. On our way to Staunton, we stopped at Greenbriar Resort in White Sulphur Springs, WV. My grandpa has mentioned this place before as a place that houses an underground bunker for government officials should something happen to the country where they would be safe. I must say, this seems a little farfetched, but if there was going to be a place for them to go, this would be ideal! It is tucked away in a little out in nowhere town in the mountains and hills. We went inside the resort to look around and take some pictures. If the government thing is incorrect, then there is lots of interesting information about this resort anyway! 26 presidents of the US have stayed here, as well as many celebrities. Frank Sinatra, Bob Hope, etc. It is beautiful and colorful and ritzy. I certainly didn't fit in there, but it was neat to go in and see how the rich live!! :)
After our trip to the Greenbriar, we got to Staunton. We went to the Frontier Museum, which is home of many old farmhouses from different countries. England, Ireland, Germany, Africa and America. Dating back from the 1600's, these homes were bought in their original countries and taken apart and brought across the ocean and put back together here. They have original wood, original windows in some of them, it is so neat! I love history, I love seeing living history.
On the grounds of the Frontier Museum is an abandoned, state owned sanitorium from many years ago. I had no idea what it was and asked one of the actors about it. Then got online and looked it up. Creepy!! Forced sterilizations were performed at this sanitorium when people were deemed mentally unstable and mentally incapable of having children. The sanitorium also housed mentally unstable children for a time. It is boarded up and the weeds are grown up around it, which only adds to the creepiness factor. I watched a video of some men going in it at night and running out scared when they heard screams (which I could hear on the video) and thumping noises (which I also heard) Yikes!!! Glad I am not staying there! But, we are staying right up the road less than a mile. Hope the ghosts stay away from here!! :)
Tomorrow, we are heading to Williamsburg. We are staying there 3 days and visiting Jamestown, Yorktown and Williamsburg. Then we are heading towards home and stopping by Mt. Vernon and coming up through Pennsylvania. I am definitely looking forward to seeing history of our country the rest of the week and I know Cameron is so excited because he loves Revolutionary War era history!! What a great vacation! We are so blessed to be able to come to places like this and see things like this. Thank you grams and pap for inviting us!
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Yard Work!
It has been a long seven years since I have had to do yard work.
Being allergic to grass kind of makes it difficult to mow and weed whack. But, I love doing it. Even though I end up looking like a giant red bump, I love it.
I used to have beautiful flowers in my flower beds. I haven't had anywhere to show off my flowers in so long I forgot I could even do it! But, this weekend, we are getting our yard ready! We got our sod MOnday and are going to put in a flower bed out front, and down the side of the house. We will be working the back yard as well, making raised beds for a garden, getting our plans for the back put together and then spreading more grass seed on the areas that will be needing grass. Dirt will be brought in by truck and flowers will be planted from the pots I have on my patio. Firepit will be lined up so that we can then put a path to it one of these days. The extension of the patio we will put in later on will be lined out.
While we don't have to mow yet, I do have a bright side. A fourteen year old! He has mowed the last two years for my grandparents and has gotten practice! We are going to get a reel mower (think old school non-powered) and he is going to be mowing for us. Along with some of our neighbors it sounds like.
Anyway, I am super stoked to get busy on making my yard one of the best in Westfield! I may be just a little biased! But I will be sure to post some pictures when it is complete!!
Until then!
Being allergic to grass kind of makes it difficult to mow and weed whack. But, I love doing it. Even though I end up looking like a giant red bump, I love it.
I used to have beautiful flowers in my flower beds. I haven't had anywhere to show off my flowers in so long I forgot I could even do it! But, this weekend, we are getting our yard ready! We got our sod MOnday and are going to put in a flower bed out front, and down the side of the house. We will be working the back yard as well, making raised beds for a garden, getting our plans for the back put together and then spreading more grass seed on the areas that will be needing grass. Dirt will be brought in by truck and flowers will be planted from the pots I have on my patio. Firepit will be lined up so that we can then put a path to it one of these days. The extension of the patio we will put in later on will be lined out.
While we don't have to mow yet, I do have a bright side. A fourteen year old! He has mowed the last two years for my grandparents and has gotten practice! We are going to get a reel mower (think old school non-powered) and he is going to be mowing for us. Along with some of our neighbors it sounds like.
Anyway, I am super stoked to get busy on making my yard one of the best in Westfield! I may be just a little biased! But I will be sure to post some pictures when it is complete!!
Until then!
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Whirlwind
The last few weeks have been a whirlwind. We closed on our house, finally. We moved. We celebrated Resurrection Sunday. All of this all in the same week!
This year at Easter, I was feeling sentimental. Because of our closing, which happened on Good Friday, we didn't get to go to church for Good Friday services. I was alittle disappointed. We have been attending College Park Church for several months now and enjoy it. I really wanted to experience Good Friday and Easter services there. But, alas, it didn't happen. We did go to Easter service and it was awesome! Pastor Mark is so passionate about Jesus! His sermons pack a punch and they bring on a challenge.
While this church is wonderful and we love to go and listen to the sermons and music, I must say that I don't feel like it is our forever church home. I think that God has put us on this path to College Park to rest. We go to church, we listen, we sing, we go home. We have no obligations. We have no jobs to do. We sit and rest. While this has been a nice change, I must say that I feel a pull to go to a smaller church and get involved again. God gives us all gifts to use. Shane and I at this point, have not gotten a chance to use our gifts for many months. When we left our old church, it was difficult, because we had been such a huge part of the worship that we felt let down. Like we had nothing left to give. We wanted to hop right back in and start leading again at a new church. However, that wasn't what God had in store for us. Even at College Park, we tried to jump right in and start leading. We had the opportunity to lead the kids worship and to be in choir and handbells, but it just didn't feel right. It felt all wrong. So we stepped back and are just sitting in worship and enjoying a time of rest.
But, I still feel that pull sometimes to get back to where we were before. I know at this point in time, it isn't going to work with Shane's job, but someday, I hope that God leads us in the right direction to where He wants us to be forever. And perhaps be able to use our gifts.
But through all of thes trials, we have been so blessed with health, happiness, opportunities, friends and family. God is rooting us on and we love Him so much. Thank you Lord for all yoru many blessings!
This year at Easter, I was feeling sentimental. Because of our closing, which happened on Good Friday, we didn't get to go to church for Good Friday services. I was alittle disappointed. We have been attending College Park Church for several months now and enjoy it. I really wanted to experience Good Friday and Easter services there. But, alas, it didn't happen. We did go to Easter service and it was awesome! Pastor Mark is so passionate about Jesus! His sermons pack a punch and they bring on a challenge.
While this church is wonderful and we love to go and listen to the sermons and music, I must say that I don't feel like it is our forever church home. I think that God has put us on this path to College Park to rest. We go to church, we listen, we sing, we go home. We have no obligations. We have no jobs to do. We sit and rest. While this has been a nice change, I must say that I feel a pull to go to a smaller church and get involved again. God gives us all gifts to use. Shane and I at this point, have not gotten a chance to use our gifts for many months. When we left our old church, it was difficult, because we had been such a huge part of the worship that we felt let down. Like we had nothing left to give. We wanted to hop right back in and start leading again at a new church. However, that wasn't what God had in store for us. Even at College Park, we tried to jump right in and start leading. We had the opportunity to lead the kids worship and to be in choir and handbells, but it just didn't feel right. It felt all wrong. So we stepped back and are just sitting in worship and enjoying a time of rest.
But, I still feel that pull sometimes to get back to where we were before. I know at this point in time, it isn't going to work with Shane's job, but someday, I hope that God leads us in the right direction to where He wants us to be forever. And perhaps be able to use our gifts.
But through all of thes trials, we have been so blessed with health, happiness, opportunities, friends and family. God is rooting us on and we love Him so much. Thank you Lord for all yoru many blessings!
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Excuse me while I puke.
My stomach turned as I read the Time magazine article. I literally felt like I was going to vomit. I happened upon it and had to read it. With all the controversy that has been going around about this particular person, I felt the need to read this article. Rob Bell. His name brings back memories of Nooma videos that I watched in a small group we were involved in once. The creep factor already had me turned away from it, but then the actual meat of the videos were just weird. They didn't make sense. They were odd. I have never been a fan of Rob Bell, nor will I ever be. I was facebooking and looking at a church facebook page and saw that they liked or followed Mars Hill church. This happens to be the church that Rob Bell "preaches" at. I went to its facebook page and was flipping through its information and happened upon the article. So I was more than a little interested in what Time magazine had to say. Love Wins is Rob Bell's newest book. I have not read this book, I do not expect to read it, I will not waste our hard earned money on garbage. Period. Now, some will say that I am judging a book by its cover, but I have read enough. I have read many quotes from Rob Bell about this book and I have seen the videos about the book. I read this article in Time and am definitely sticking to my guns on not reading this book. I believe in Heaven. I believe in Hell. I believe in Salvation. I believe that Jesus is the Son of God and that He died on the cross for me. His blood shed for my sins. I believe that only the people that have been saved by grace will go to heaven. I believe that homosexuality is wrong and that the bible says it quite clearly. I believe that adultery is wrong and that the bible says so very clearly. The ten commandments are not there to look cool on the wall in your living room. They are there for a reason. While we are not without sin, we are forgiven by the blood of Jesus. I believe that the church should be full of praise to Jesus, celebrating His death and resurrection. We should have crosses lined up everywhere around us so to remind us of what He did for us. We should be on our knees at the altar rejoicing that Jesus is there to wrap His loving arms around us when we fall. Now, back to Rob Bell and my disgust for him. I know there are some out there that follow him and love him. They sit every Sunday at his church and listen to him and love it. There are churches out there that follow the gospel according to the prophet Rob Bell. I know there are. There are people that will follow him and judge people like me for not liking him or his blasphemous spewing. I know there are pastors out there that will stick up for him and say things like, "we don't know for sure that he is wrong." "we don't know for sure that there is no hell". I say there is nothing more to explain. Just look at the cross. Just look at Jesus. Read His words. Read the bible. Pray. Open your eyes to Him. In fact, last week, our pastor of the church we have been going to since the fall said if you don't want to hear about Jesus and the Cross, then you don't belong at this church, because that is all we have. All we have is Jesus and the cross. Here is the statement that most bothered me about Rob Bell's interview. When talking about the Minister in Florida or wherever it was that burned the Koran. Rob Bell said he didn't agree with that and that Jesus doesn't either. He said "I am pretty sure that Jesus is p!$$ed off about that." Can you believe that? I couldn't even read it out loud to Shane when I read that. I was so taken aback to his audacity to actually put words to Jesus. And in that way. To say He would be "p!$$ed off". I literally felt the acid burning in my throat. There are so many people out there that are seekers wanting to find out more about God and Jesus and they might happen apon this book since it is getting so much press and then end up reading this garbage and then getting the wrong idea about Christianity and God and Jesus. It makes my heart so sad to think that there might be people that fall for this man's spewing. I feel sorry for the people of his church. He is what I like to call a "warm and fuzzy" preacher. He tells you that you should pat yourself on the back for coming to church and then goes on and on about good qualitites that make you a good person and then sends you on your way. "Good for you for coming to church and giving me your money, now go on and live a good life until next Sunday". No mention of Jesus or the Cross or God. No flowing scriptures. Just a bunch of fluff and that's it. Too many churches are going that direction so as not to offend anyone. PREACH JESUS!!!! IT IS ONLY BY THE BLOOD OF JESUS WE CAN BE FREE!!!!!!!!!!!! Okay, off my soapbox now. If you have a different opinion, feel free to voice it. I am open to discussion. :) I would love to hear what you have to say.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Writer's Block
Writer's Block
The time in a writer's life when they can't seem to find an idea to write about. I go through fits of this. I took a class several years ago on writing children's books. I enjoyed the class, but there were times when the assignments would be something I had to make up from scratch, without any prompts. I would sit and think and think and wonder what to write about. Sometimes, I woudl put it away and not think about it for a few days and then an idea would just pop in my head. I would sit down and feverishly write until it was finished and boom, there was my story.
When I thought about writing a novel, rather than a children's book, it seemed like a task that I wouldn't be able to finish. I had so many ideas and has written some children's manuscripts, thinking I would send them in to a publisher and see what happened, but then this novel idea came up and I felt like it needed to be done. So I sat down and started it while in the waiting room when Shane was having the second surgery on his foot after he broke his ankle. This would've been in fall 2006 I think. I then took the time to take the idea I was writing about and it turned into an 83 page novel that was published in May 2007. It only took me three months to type the manuscript. I have read many times how some author's can write a novel for years while the plot develops, while the characters get personality, etc. For some reason, the characters in my story were in my mind for a long time. The plot was in my mind already. I knew I wanted it to be young adult. I knew I didn't want to write a children's book when the words first started pouring out of my fingers.
I was surprised that the first publisher I sent my novel to accepted it and sent a contract. It was a dream come true to me. I have always been a writer. I have always had composition books full of poems, stories, etc. I had heard in the writing class I took that it was typically hard to find a publisher to accept a manuscript the first time. I was expecting to be declined and have to move on to the next guy, but it happened. Like it was meant to be published.
Since that time in 2006/2007 when my book came out, I have felt like I have had a sort of writer's block. Like all the stories in my mind are just jumbled up in my head and I can't get them on paper. When I get something started, it just doesn't look right or read right to me. I get started on a new novel, and the words just stop at an idea. I think the plot will start to come to me as I write, but alas, it does not.
I sat in my bed last night after Shane and I finished chatting online and I sat there in the quiet and thought about writing. Now that I have time on my hands with Shane being on the road and Cameron still in school, I have a lot of time to sit and think about my characters. My plots. I have a couple novels started, but none of them have gotten past the first initial character plots. Nothing has become of them. I am starting to get the writer's block out of my mind again and starting to get ideas on how to shape these characters and how to move forward with their stories. Now to get the ideas on paper!!
Who knows, maybe I am a one and done author. One novel and that's it. I will probably never be a bestseller, but I can at least write and hopefully someone will get something out of what I write about. Who knows? Maybe the two children's manuscripts are the next book waiting to be printed....
You never know what the future holds. But for now, I can at least start writing about it......
The time in a writer's life when they can't seem to find an idea to write about. I go through fits of this. I took a class several years ago on writing children's books. I enjoyed the class, but there were times when the assignments would be something I had to make up from scratch, without any prompts. I would sit and think and think and wonder what to write about. Sometimes, I woudl put it away and not think about it for a few days and then an idea would just pop in my head. I would sit down and feverishly write until it was finished and boom, there was my story.
When I thought about writing a novel, rather than a children's book, it seemed like a task that I wouldn't be able to finish. I had so many ideas and has written some children's manuscripts, thinking I would send them in to a publisher and see what happened, but then this novel idea came up and I felt like it needed to be done. So I sat down and started it while in the waiting room when Shane was having the second surgery on his foot after he broke his ankle. This would've been in fall 2006 I think. I then took the time to take the idea I was writing about and it turned into an 83 page novel that was published in May 2007. It only took me three months to type the manuscript. I have read many times how some author's can write a novel for years while the plot develops, while the characters get personality, etc. For some reason, the characters in my story were in my mind for a long time. The plot was in my mind already. I knew I wanted it to be young adult. I knew I didn't want to write a children's book when the words first started pouring out of my fingers.
I was surprised that the first publisher I sent my novel to accepted it and sent a contract. It was a dream come true to me. I have always been a writer. I have always had composition books full of poems, stories, etc. I had heard in the writing class I took that it was typically hard to find a publisher to accept a manuscript the first time. I was expecting to be declined and have to move on to the next guy, but it happened. Like it was meant to be published.
Since that time in 2006/2007 when my book came out, I have felt like I have had a sort of writer's block. Like all the stories in my mind are just jumbled up in my head and I can't get them on paper. When I get something started, it just doesn't look right or read right to me. I get started on a new novel, and the words just stop at an idea. I think the plot will start to come to me as I write, but alas, it does not.
I sat in my bed last night after Shane and I finished chatting online and I sat there in the quiet and thought about writing. Now that I have time on my hands with Shane being on the road and Cameron still in school, I have a lot of time to sit and think about my characters. My plots. I have a couple novels started, but none of them have gotten past the first initial character plots. Nothing has become of them. I am starting to get the writer's block out of my mind again and starting to get ideas on how to shape these characters and how to move forward with their stories. Now to get the ideas on paper!!
Who knows, maybe I am a one and done author. One novel and that's it. I will probably never be a bestseller, but I can at least write and hopefully someone will get something out of what I write about. Who knows? Maybe the two children's manuscripts are the next book waiting to be printed....
You never know what the future holds. But for now, I can at least start writing about it......
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Real Estate
"I never get what I really want. I always get a lot of stupid toys, or a bicycle or clothes or something that."
"What is it that you want?"
"Real estate."
Lucy and Charlie Brown get into a conversation during the Christmas season and they discuss what they want for Christmas. Lucy reveals that she never gets what she really wants, and when Charlie Brown asks her what she wants, she says real estate. A girl after my own heart!
Ever since I was a kid, I remember my dad taking my mom and I on little cruises around the Hamilton, Marion and Boone counties, showing us the big huge houses he had delivered trim or doors to the day before. I distinctly remember sitting in the truck and looking in awe at these huge, beautiful homes.
When I was a teenager, it never occured to me that I could be a realtor. I loved houses, had a passion for them, but it never seemed like at career day, the choice of realtor was ever available. It was always doctors, lawyers, teachers, etc. I swore up and down I wanted to be a meteorologist, then I wanted to be a guidance counselor at a school, then I wanted to be a teacher, then I wanted to be a......you name it. It wasn't until we lost our home to mold and bad dealings with an unethical realtor that it really hit me. I could still be a realtor. You don't need a college degree. You don't need to spend exorbitant amounts of money to get started. (I mean large student loans and stuff like that you would need for college. If you count the fees for the board of realtors, you would think it is expensive) I could do this.
I spent several years saving up for the real estate class. Finally I got to sign up and go. I finished with flying colors and went to take the exam for my license. Passed on the first try. Got it all done, got my license active and paid my MIBOR fees. No luck with finding clients, but I got my feet wet in the business. Then I got a few clients and it all was good. Until I couldn't afford the fees and had to walk away from my career that I loved so much and go back to substitute teaching to pay bills.
Finally, after 3 years, I get to be a realtor again. I have changed companies and am very excited to work with my broker, whom I actually went to high school with! Such a breath of fresh air to have a moral, ethical person to work with.
So, I am active and ready for all the people out there that have real estate needs. Call me up, email me, facebook message me. I am ready and eager to help you out. If you are looking for a moral, ethical person to work with, you have to look no further than right here.
So excited for all the exciting things going on in our lives right now. We have a closing date for our house and are packing and ready to move. Shane starts his sales job in 2 weeks and is so excited. So much to thank God for right now in our lives. And I fall to my knees to think that He loves me so much to give me so many blessings in my life.
"What is it that you want?"
"Real estate."
Lucy and Charlie Brown get into a conversation during the Christmas season and they discuss what they want for Christmas. Lucy reveals that she never gets what she really wants, and when Charlie Brown asks her what she wants, she says real estate. A girl after my own heart!
Ever since I was a kid, I remember my dad taking my mom and I on little cruises around the Hamilton, Marion and Boone counties, showing us the big huge houses he had delivered trim or doors to the day before. I distinctly remember sitting in the truck and looking in awe at these huge, beautiful homes.
When I was a teenager, it never occured to me that I could be a realtor. I loved houses, had a passion for them, but it never seemed like at career day, the choice of realtor was ever available. It was always doctors, lawyers, teachers, etc. I swore up and down I wanted to be a meteorologist, then I wanted to be a guidance counselor at a school, then I wanted to be a teacher, then I wanted to be a......you name it. It wasn't until we lost our home to mold and bad dealings with an unethical realtor that it really hit me. I could still be a realtor. You don't need a college degree. You don't need to spend exorbitant amounts of money to get started. (I mean large student loans and stuff like that you would need for college. If you count the fees for the board of realtors, you would think it is expensive) I could do this.
I spent several years saving up for the real estate class. Finally I got to sign up and go. I finished with flying colors and went to take the exam for my license. Passed on the first try. Got it all done, got my license active and paid my MIBOR fees. No luck with finding clients, but I got my feet wet in the business. Then I got a few clients and it all was good. Until I couldn't afford the fees and had to walk away from my career that I loved so much and go back to substitute teaching to pay bills.
Finally, after 3 years, I get to be a realtor again. I have changed companies and am very excited to work with my broker, whom I actually went to high school with! Such a breath of fresh air to have a moral, ethical person to work with.
So, I am active and ready for all the people out there that have real estate needs. Call me up, email me, facebook message me. I am ready and eager to help you out. If you are looking for a moral, ethical person to work with, you have to look no further than right here.
So excited for all the exciting things going on in our lives right now. We have a closing date for our house and are packing and ready to move. Shane starts his sales job in 2 weeks and is so excited. So much to thank God for right now in our lives. And I fall to my knees to think that He loves me so much to give me so many blessings in my life.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Saying Hello to the Future
Our good friends moved on Saturday. They moved to a different state. We had lunch with them last Sunday after church and it was nice to sit down and catch up. I realized at that point that we took the fact that they lived so close for granted. It is always hard to say goodbye to someone. No matter what the circumstances are, it is never easy to say goodbye.
As they were moving to a new home and new life, we were painting our house. We are doing the paint equity in the house to help with our down payment. It is nice they have that option. We had plenty for the down payment, but if we can get an extra $2026 out of them, bring it on! It is rough work, on your knees on concrete floor, caulking, getting dirty, getting paint in your hair, making sure the primer is on thick enough, semi-gloss vs. flat paint. You get the picture. As I was sitting, taking a break, drinking some water, I looked around me and I looked at what we were doing and it hit me. Like a ton of bricks it hit me. This is real, this is the future I had all planned out for us. A nice sized house for the three of us, Shane has a great job, a college degree, I have a great job, one that I can still be at home, work from home even, and still be there to take care of all the minute details of the finances, the cooking, the cleaning, the caretaking, etc. CWe live in a great, safe area, in the suburbs. Our little piece of heaven right here on earth. It didn't occur to me before until I was inside this home working, that we are saying hello to the future! A future Shane and I discussed when I was pregnant with Cameron so many years ago! The things we dreamed of for our lives. The goals we had for the future, here it is. All of it. We couldn't ask for anything else.
As we say goodbye to our past, we say hello to the future. God has richly blessed us.
As they were moving to a new home and new life, we were painting our house. We are doing the paint equity in the house to help with our down payment. It is nice they have that option. We had plenty for the down payment, but if we can get an extra $2026 out of them, bring it on! It is rough work, on your knees on concrete floor, caulking, getting dirty, getting paint in your hair, making sure the primer is on thick enough, semi-gloss vs. flat paint. You get the picture. As I was sitting, taking a break, drinking some water, I looked around me and I looked at what we were doing and it hit me. Like a ton of bricks it hit me. This is real, this is the future I had all planned out for us. A nice sized house for the three of us, Shane has a great job, a college degree, I have a great job, one that I can still be at home, work from home even, and still be there to take care of all the minute details of the finances, the cooking, the cleaning, the caretaking, etc. CWe live in a great, safe area, in the suburbs. Our little piece of heaven right here on earth. It didn't occur to me before until I was inside this home working, that we are saying hello to the future! A future Shane and I discussed when I was pregnant with Cameron so many years ago! The things we dreamed of for our lives. The goals we had for the future, here it is. All of it. We couldn't ask for anything else.
As we say goodbye to our past, we say hello to the future. God has richly blessed us.
Monday, February 21, 2011
Painting and Priming and Houses OH MY!!!!
Paint is bought, caulk is bought, rollers are ready. Painting commences in T- 3 days. We have two full weeks to get our entire house interior primed and painted. I am looking forward to getting in there and getting it ready to close. They will have the cabinets and countertops already installed, the trim and doors up, all ready to bepainted and then the flooring will be put down, some finishing touches and then we close!
While it has only been a 5 month timeline, I feel like it has been a year to complete this house building process. I guess when I worked for Davis homes and was the salesperson, it seemed like they put them up in no time, but now that I am the homeowner and on the other side of the process, it seems to take forever! I know I am just being impatient, but I am so ready to be a homeowner and get settled into our home. We have been kind of like drifters since we moved to Westfield, living a year or so in one place, then moving on to bigger and better. Finally, we can settle down. Nobody thinks we will stay there long, but I am going to prove them wrong. I never can settle into a house or apartment very long, because it isn't what I really want. I always told Shane from the day we got married, and talking about our goals in our married life. I wanted a 3 bedroom, 2 bath ranch home. I wanted a big bathtub and a kitchen with an island and a little front porch so I can sit out there in the rain and not get wet. I want a nice sized backyard with the ability to put in flower beds and a small raised bed garden and a fireplace. So, now, I get what I have always wanted except more because we have an upstairs bonus room.
So, we have this week and a month left until we close. So 5 more weeks basically. I cannot wait. Finally our hard work has paid off and we are ready to settle down. So many changes in our life this year. A house, Shane's job is changing, I am getting back in real estate probably later this week or so, Cameron going into high school. Lots of changes. But I am ready for all of them.
Here we go!
While it has only been a 5 month timeline, I feel like it has been a year to complete this house building process. I guess when I worked for Davis homes and was the salesperson, it seemed like they put them up in no time, but now that I am the homeowner and on the other side of the process, it seems to take forever! I know I am just being impatient, but I am so ready to be a homeowner and get settled into our home. We have been kind of like drifters since we moved to Westfield, living a year or so in one place, then moving on to bigger and better. Finally, we can settle down. Nobody thinks we will stay there long, but I am going to prove them wrong. I never can settle into a house or apartment very long, because it isn't what I really want. I always told Shane from the day we got married, and talking about our goals in our married life. I wanted a 3 bedroom, 2 bath ranch home. I wanted a big bathtub and a kitchen with an island and a little front porch so I can sit out there in the rain and not get wet. I want a nice sized backyard with the ability to put in flower beds and a small raised bed garden and a fireplace. So, now, I get what I have always wanted except more because we have an upstairs bonus room.
So, we have this week and a month left until we close. So 5 more weeks basically. I cannot wait. Finally our hard work has paid off and we are ready to settle down. So many changes in our life this year. A house, Shane's job is changing, I am getting back in real estate probably later this week or so, Cameron going into high school. Lots of changes. But I am ready for all of them.
Here we go!
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
TV = Blah.
I don't watch a lot of tv. I have never been a huge tv watcher. I have had a few shows that I got into and watched religiously. I have been off and on watching One Life to Live since I was 13. I still look forward to watching it now. I like to watch Glee, and I was once addicted to Dawson's Creek.
I would rather listen to music than watch tv. I have always been a music junkie.
however, yesterday Shane was home sick. There is two things to notice in that sentence.
1. Shane was home
2. Shane was sick.
What does this mean for me? Well, it means taking care of him and being forced to watch tv all day. He started by watching a movie, then some tv shows he likes, then I got to watch one life to live then he took over and watched another movie or so until Glee came on. I have no idea what we watched. I was so busy trying to find something else to do instead of watch tv. If I watch tv for too long, my eyes end up all gritty and unfocused and I can't sleep.
Well, seems like Shane can watch tv all day with no problems. Cameron too. They can sit and watch movies all day long and be fine and content. I cannot. For one, ADD kicks in and I have to be doing something. Two, it makes me feel like crap if I sit in front of the tv too much. Ugh.
Thankfully, Shane is feeling better and went to work this morning. Thank goodness! Not that I don't like him being at home with me, but I cannot sit for another day and watch tv.
I am going to go outside today. It is going to be so nice out today. In the 50's and sunny! I can't wait!
I would rather listen to music than watch tv. I have always been a music junkie.
however, yesterday Shane was home sick. There is two things to notice in that sentence.
1. Shane was home
2. Shane was sick.
What does this mean for me? Well, it means taking care of him and being forced to watch tv all day. He started by watching a movie, then some tv shows he likes, then I got to watch one life to live then he took over and watched another movie or so until Glee came on. I have no idea what we watched. I was so busy trying to find something else to do instead of watch tv. If I watch tv for too long, my eyes end up all gritty and unfocused and I can't sleep.
Well, seems like Shane can watch tv all day with no problems. Cameron too. They can sit and watch movies all day long and be fine and content. I cannot. For one, ADD kicks in and I have to be doing something. Two, it makes me feel like crap if I sit in front of the tv too much. Ugh.
Thankfully, Shane is feeling better and went to work this morning. Thank goodness! Not that I don't like him being at home with me, but I cannot sit for another day and watch tv.
I am going to go outside today. It is going to be so nice out today. In the 50's and sunny! I can't wait!
Monday, February 14, 2011
Spring
I do this every year. I sit at home with my sweatshirt on, bundled up on the couch with a thick blanket, looking outside while it is overcast and cold, snow piled up and looking brown and dirty. I sit there and grumble and whine about how much winter stinks. Then it happens. The 7 day forecast comes up and there is a glimmer of hope in the drudgery of winter. It gets in the 40's or 50's for a week and I go crazy! Get the shovels back out happily to scooop the leftover slush away, clear out the sidewalk, driveway and anything in the way. I get my walking shoes on and go outside in the wet thawed out world and hit the pavement.
So it won't last. I know this. It happens every year. There is a nice thaw, warm temps and then boom, gone. Sometimes a big winter storm comes and takes away the hope for the spring.
So if you need me in the next few days, you might try the walking trails! I will be hitting the pavement all week to get the winter blahs our of my system!
Later peeps!
So it won't last. I know this. It happens every year. There is a nice thaw, warm temps and then boom, gone. Sometimes a big winter storm comes and takes away the hope for the spring.
So if you need me in the next few days, you might try the walking trails! I will be hitting the pavement all week to get the winter blahs our of my system!
Later peeps!
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Ahhh....memories.
I got in my big stereo the other day and pulled out some old CD's to listen to. They are my old CD's from high school, from the 1990's. Quite the interesting range of music. I have everything from classical music to broadway musicals, to soundtracks to movies, to angry chick music.
So I sifted through the CD's and decided to listen to one of my faves from my junior year, Alanis Morissette. Yikes! I guess when you're 16, you don't pay that much attention to the lyrics of the music you are listening to. As I was sitting there, I heard practically every curse word in the book, everything from being mad at someone to wanting to have vengeance on an ex, to being thankful, to going to confession. What?!?! She is an odd duck.
So as I was listening to my music, Cameron comes home and hears some of it and we get into a conversation about what kind of person I was in high school. As an up and coming freshmen, he wanted to gauge how it was going to be. Now, I am not that old, only being 31. But I know for a fact, as a substitute teacher, that high school is very different than when I was there. Some things are the same, but it is a vastly different place than what I remember. It doesn't help that Cameron is going to a huge high school and I went to a school that had less students in the entire high school than he will have in his graduating class!
Anyhow, it will be interesting to see just how different things are for him than they were for me. I was the type of girl in high school that didn't care much about what people thought of me. I wore mismatched socks and my hair in a ponytail. I walked around with my friends and got called a band geek. I didn't care. I took pride in what I was involved in and didn't care what anyone else thought about it. I spent all my free time listening to music and singing along to broadway titles and pop music.
After Cameron listened to a little Alanis, he came to the conclusion that I was "emo" in high school. I told him that type of music was what was popular back then. Grunge, "emo" music, cranberries, alanis, sophie b hawkins, weezer, etc.
Anyway, it got me thinking, I wonder what Cameron will look back on when he is 31 and remember about high school? Will he be a band geek because he is in marching band? Will he be popular? Will he end up finding his soulmate in high school like Shane and I did? Who will he take to prom and what will be his best memories? Who will he be excited to see at his 10 year reunion? 20 year reunion? Will he still graduate wanting to be an archaeologist or biblical historian?
So many exciting times ahead of him. I am excited to see him through it. All the ups and downs of being in high school. Friends that come and go. Girlfriends and broken hearts. I hope he comes out of it as unscathed as possible. No long lasting pains.
While I wouldn't go back to high school if someone paid me to, I have lots of fond memories and some painful memories. What do you remember most from your years in high school? A certain boy/girlfriend? The Prom? Graduation? Extracurricular activities?
For me, I enjoyed marching band and winter guard the most. I learned a lot. I was a spelling bee champion, and a spell bowl nerd. But, all in all, I remember my friends and regret not keeping in touch with them as well after we graduated.
ahh memories.....
So I sifted through the CD's and decided to listen to one of my faves from my junior year, Alanis Morissette. Yikes! I guess when you're 16, you don't pay that much attention to the lyrics of the music you are listening to. As I was sitting there, I heard practically every curse word in the book, everything from being mad at someone to wanting to have vengeance on an ex, to being thankful, to going to confession. What?!?! She is an odd duck.
So as I was listening to my music, Cameron comes home and hears some of it and we get into a conversation about what kind of person I was in high school. As an up and coming freshmen, he wanted to gauge how it was going to be. Now, I am not that old, only being 31. But I know for a fact, as a substitute teacher, that high school is very different than when I was there. Some things are the same, but it is a vastly different place than what I remember. It doesn't help that Cameron is going to a huge high school and I went to a school that had less students in the entire high school than he will have in his graduating class!
Anyhow, it will be interesting to see just how different things are for him than they were for me. I was the type of girl in high school that didn't care much about what people thought of me. I wore mismatched socks and my hair in a ponytail. I walked around with my friends and got called a band geek. I didn't care. I took pride in what I was involved in and didn't care what anyone else thought about it. I spent all my free time listening to music and singing along to broadway titles and pop music.
After Cameron listened to a little Alanis, he came to the conclusion that I was "emo" in high school. I told him that type of music was what was popular back then. Grunge, "emo" music, cranberries, alanis, sophie b hawkins, weezer, etc.
Anyway, it got me thinking, I wonder what Cameron will look back on when he is 31 and remember about high school? Will he be a band geek because he is in marching band? Will he be popular? Will he end up finding his soulmate in high school like Shane and I did? Who will he take to prom and what will be his best memories? Who will he be excited to see at his 10 year reunion? 20 year reunion? Will he still graduate wanting to be an archaeologist or biblical historian?
So many exciting times ahead of him. I am excited to see him through it. All the ups and downs of being in high school. Friends that come and go. Girlfriends and broken hearts. I hope he comes out of it as unscathed as possible. No long lasting pains.
While I wouldn't go back to high school if someone paid me to, I have lots of fond memories and some painful memories. What do you remember most from your years in high school? A certain boy/girlfriend? The Prom? Graduation? Extracurricular activities?
For me, I enjoyed marching band and winter guard the most. I learned a lot. I was a spelling bee champion, and a spell bowl nerd. But, all in all, I remember my friends and regret not keeping in touch with them as well after we graduated.
ahh memories.....
80 year old woman.
I woke up this morning feeling like an old woman. My back is so tight and knotted up that I can barely stand up straight. I have always had lower back issues since I was a kid. My back curves in too much and it causes pain.
Well, after spending 2 hours last week scooping ice to form a path from our front door to the street, I felt it. Then I kept trying to keep it clear every time it would snow (which seems like every day these days).
I helped move our new sectional sofa into our condo on Sunday and yesterday I spent about an hour and half hepling my parents and grandparents scoop out their driveway. Well, I was working pretty hard and bending over to scoop big shovelfuls of snow and ice and throwing it across to the yard....bad idea by the way.
So now I am in serious pain with my back. I am doing laundry today and sitting is the only thing that doesn't hurt, except when I change positions. The laundry baskets, which usually get thrown around with no problem, weigh at least 752, 683 lbs. today.
Going to soak in the bathtub and get the icy hot out to rub into my back. Maybe that will help...maybe it will just take some time to heal up. Time will tell.
In the meantime, might be a good time to catch up on some blogging and some light packing. This condo keeps getting smaller and smaller with all the packing and the new sectional in the living room along with the old couch....ugh.
How much longer until we get to move?
We have our pre-drywall meeting tomorrow morning. Cannot wait, because we will get our approximate closing date and I can start planning ahead for it!! Yay!!
If you see me out and about, I may be the one that looks young but is walking hunched over like an old lady....
:)
Well, after spending 2 hours last week scooping ice to form a path from our front door to the street, I felt it. Then I kept trying to keep it clear every time it would snow (which seems like every day these days).
I helped move our new sectional sofa into our condo on Sunday and yesterday I spent about an hour and half hepling my parents and grandparents scoop out their driveway. Well, I was working pretty hard and bending over to scoop big shovelfuls of snow and ice and throwing it across to the yard....bad idea by the way.
So now I am in serious pain with my back. I am doing laundry today and sitting is the only thing that doesn't hurt, except when I change positions. The laundry baskets, which usually get thrown around with no problem, weigh at least 752, 683 lbs. today.
Going to soak in the bathtub and get the icy hot out to rub into my back. Maybe that will help...maybe it will just take some time to heal up. Time will tell.
In the meantime, might be a good time to catch up on some blogging and some light packing. This condo keeps getting smaller and smaller with all the packing and the new sectional in the living room along with the old couch....ugh.
How much longer until we get to move?
We have our pre-drywall meeting tomorrow morning. Cannot wait, because we will get our approximate closing date and I can start planning ahead for it!! Yay!!
If you see me out and about, I may be the one that looks young but is walking hunched over like an old lady....
:)
Thursday, January 27, 2011
The Real Me
I had no idea who Natalie Grant was for a long time. I ended up getting her CD from my mother in law for Christmas one year and stuck the CD in the storage area of the stereo and forgot about it.
One day, I was looking for something to listen to and came across the unopened CD. We were getting into leading worship at church and I was trying to find some inspiration for some new songs. So I opened the case and popped the CD in. The first song was Awaken and it was okay, I went through, listening for the song I was looking for. I listened some more and they were decent songs, catchy enough, but one song struck me. The words were powerful. The Real Me. It hit me that this is me. I have always hid behind my skin and didn't let the world in because too many times I had gotten hurt. This song reminded me that God always knows the real me, even if the real me isn't out there for everyone to see. As you know, I am introverted. If I see you out at a restaurant or something, I will probably not come up to you and talk to you, even if I know you very well and we are good friends. I always wait for you to come to me. I am not being a snob, just being me. A lot of people dont' give me a chance because I have a wall built up around me. So they automatically assume I am the biggest snob on earth and never try to break down the wall and get to know me. The one thing you do want to know about me is this, while I may be shy and introverted, I am not ever going to sugar coat things. If you ask me a question, I will answer honestly, even if that hurts your feelings. I was taught as a kid that you stand up for your beliefs and you always tell the truth, no matter what the consequences are. If someone asks you for your opinion, you tell them the truth. I am not always right, but I will give my opinion on the matter and move on. Even if I know the opinion differs from yours. Some have learned that the hard way, and I have lost friends that way, but to me, the truth is it.
The words to this song tell a story and it paints a picture of how a lot of us, (probably more than a lot, probably everyone at some point in time in our lives) hide behind a mask. We don't go out in the world and act like our true selves.
The Real Me
Foolish heart looks like we're here again
Same old game of plastic smile, don't let anybody in
Hiding my heartache, will this glass house break?
How much will they take before I'm empty?
Do I let it show, does anybody know?
But you see, the real me
Hiding in my skin, broken from within
Unveil me, completely
I'm loosening my grasp
There's no need to mask my frailty
Cause you see the real me
Painted on, life is behind a mask
Self inflicted circus clown
Tired of this song and dance
Living a charade, always on parade
What a mess I've made of my existence
But you love me even now, still I see you somehow
That you see, the real me
Hiding in my skin, broken from within
Unveil me completely
I'm loosening my grasp
There's no need to mask, my frailty
Oh cause you see, the real me
Wonderful, beautiful
Is what you see when you look at me
You're turning the tattered fabric of my life into a perfect tapestry
Oh I just wanna be me.
I wanna be me.
Cause you see, the real me
Hiding in my skin, broken from within
Unveil me completely
I'm loosening my grasp,
There's no need to mask my frailty,
Oh cause you see the real me.
And you love me,
Just as I am
Wonderful beautiful
Is what you see,
When you look at me.
So when you run into me somewhere, say hello, if you want to. I will always say hello back to you. :)
One day, I was looking for something to listen to and came across the unopened CD. We were getting into leading worship at church and I was trying to find some inspiration for some new songs. So I opened the case and popped the CD in. The first song was Awaken and it was okay, I went through, listening for the song I was looking for. I listened some more and they were decent songs, catchy enough, but one song struck me. The words were powerful. The Real Me. It hit me that this is me. I have always hid behind my skin and didn't let the world in because too many times I had gotten hurt. This song reminded me that God always knows the real me, even if the real me isn't out there for everyone to see. As you know, I am introverted. If I see you out at a restaurant or something, I will probably not come up to you and talk to you, even if I know you very well and we are good friends. I always wait for you to come to me. I am not being a snob, just being me. A lot of people dont' give me a chance because I have a wall built up around me. So they automatically assume I am the biggest snob on earth and never try to break down the wall and get to know me. The one thing you do want to know about me is this, while I may be shy and introverted, I am not ever going to sugar coat things. If you ask me a question, I will answer honestly, even if that hurts your feelings. I was taught as a kid that you stand up for your beliefs and you always tell the truth, no matter what the consequences are. If someone asks you for your opinion, you tell them the truth. I am not always right, but I will give my opinion on the matter and move on. Even if I know the opinion differs from yours. Some have learned that the hard way, and I have lost friends that way, but to me, the truth is it.
The words to this song tell a story and it paints a picture of how a lot of us, (probably more than a lot, probably everyone at some point in time in our lives) hide behind a mask. We don't go out in the world and act like our true selves.
The Real Me
Foolish heart looks like we're here again
Same old game of plastic smile, don't let anybody in
Hiding my heartache, will this glass house break?
How much will they take before I'm empty?
Do I let it show, does anybody know?
But you see, the real me
Hiding in my skin, broken from within
Unveil me, completely
I'm loosening my grasp
There's no need to mask my frailty
Cause you see the real me
Painted on, life is behind a mask
Self inflicted circus clown
Tired of this song and dance
Living a charade, always on parade
What a mess I've made of my existence
But you love me even now, still I see you somehow
That you see, the real me
Hiding in my skin, broken from within
Unveil me completely
I'm loosening my grasp
There's no need to mask, my frailty
Oh cause you see, the real me
Wonderful, beautiful
Is what you see when you look at me
You're turning the tattered fabric of my life into a perfect tapestry
Oh I just wanna be me.
I wanna be me.
Cause you see, the real me
Hiding in my skin, broken from within
Unveil me completely
I'm loosening my grasp,
There's no need to mask my frailty,
Oh cause you see the real me.
And you love me,
Just as I am
Wonderful beautiful
Is what you see,
When you look at me.
So when you run into me somewhere, say hello, if you want to. I will always say hello back to you. :)
Random Thoughts...
I am sitting here, it is 1:30 in the afternoon and I have a million thoughts running through my head.
1. I drove by our new house we are having built. They are putting the windows in, and then I expect tomorrow, they will be starting the roof. It has gone by so quickly, even though a few weeks ago, it seemed like it was taking forever. In just about 10 weeks, we will be homeowners again. It has been 8 years since we lost our house in Sheridan. The mold caused the problem and it was far too much to fix. So we lost it. Thinking we would never get another house of our own, we resigned to just being renters for a long time. We checked it out a few times, only to be told we needed to get credit cards to get our credit score up to where they wanted it. We said no to credit cards and just assumed we would never get in a house. As a realtor, it is a dream to own your own home. That's my job and when I was helping others buy a home, I felt a little hole inside my heart because I knew I couldn't. It hurt. But that's why I went into real estate, one, I love and have a passion for houses and helping people buy a home. Two, I didn't want someone else to go through what we went through with our first house.
2. I was driving down the road and thought I saw someone I know. Someone that I thought was a friend, but they showed their true colors and caused me a lot of sadness and hurt. I haven't seen or heard from this person since this all went down about 6 months ago, nor do I care to. We moved on and they have moved on and that is fine. I don't wish them ill will or anything, but I don't want to hang out either. My stomach did flips when I saw their car, but after getting a little closer, I found out it wasn't that particular person. I was relieved, and felt a little silly that the thought of seeing this person would cause me such anxiety. Being an introvert, it is hard enough to trust people to get to know me, the real me, and become friends with someone. But, when someone hurts me, I become a mute and hide in my shell. Building up the wall, adding another layer of bricks to try to make it inpenetrable. I forgive, but it is hard to forget when someone hurts you. So, I try to just avoid these people and move on.
3. My son just got his schedule set up for 9th grade. When did this happen?? When did he become a young adult? It seems to have happened right before my eyes and I just didn't pay attention. He is going to turn 14 in May. It doesn't seem like that much time has passed. In four years, my son will be graduating high school and going to college. I am thankful that I have such a wonderful son. God gave me this great kid to raise. He is doing marching band this summer, which Shane and I are very excited about. When he was very young, we decided to let him make his own decisions about extracurricular activities. He could try whatever sport or activity he wanted and make his own decisions about it. He played baseball, basketball, football, karate, but he never fond his competitive side. He loves art and music. He has always like music, but the last few years, he has found his musical side. He came home in 5th grade and announced that he was going to join band, which surprised us, because he was vehemently against band previously. But he starting playing the tuba and enjoyed it and is pretty good at it. He is talented in art as well and I love to see his art when he is done with it and brings it to me. His art teachers have always said he has a natural talent in art. His band teachers have told us he has a natural ability in music as well. I couldn't be more excited about this. I think it is wonderful that he has found his niche. I think he will enjoy marching band a lot, just like Shane and I did. He has decided to go to school to be an archaeologist or a biblical historian. I am so proud.
4. We have been going to College Park Church since September. We love the pastor, we love the sermons, we love the environment there. I hope that this fall, Cameron can get involved in the youth program. He is introverted, like me, and has a hard time getting involved in things. He gets so nervous before, but once he gets into it, he loves it. I just have a hard time getting him to go that first time. I was going to join the bells and choir, but if you keep reading, you will understand why that will be hard. We love the music. Eric, the worship leader, is exactly like our old church's worship leaders. They would mix in some contemporary music with hymns and made it enjoyable for all. Eric is like that and we love the music! Sometimes, when a song starts, Shane and I will look at each other and tears will sometimes glisten in our eyes as we remember singing the same song while we were leading worship. We love it there. Pastor Mark is so good at preaching. I love to listen to his sermons.
5. Here's the reason why I am not going to join bells or choir at this point in time. Shane is changing positions at his company. He will be starting March 1. He will be going into sales, and be leaving for the week to travel to different states in his territory and meeting with the dealers. He will be gone Monday through Friday and have the weekends off. I am actually looking forward to this. Not because I want him to be gone, but because the weekends will be free from texts, phone calls, having to run to the office to do work, etc. we will be able to have dinner with my family or his family or with friends without interruption. He is excited as well for the opportunity to get away from the office and not have all the stress from there. He is so stressed right now and it wears him down. So, he will be going on the road to his 11 state territory and Cameron and I will be here. But, when there are breaks from school, we may go with Shane and hang out with him that week. Originally, we thought about homeschooling so we could go with him more, but I think that will not work out after all. I think Cameron needs the time away from me during the day, especially if it just him and I during the week. I am looking forward to moving into our house so there will be yardwork to keep Cam and I busy, and I will have my front porch to sit on and read in the evenings when it warm, the patio in the backyard to sit down and look around. There are flowers to be planted, a raised bed garden to work in, weeds to pull, grass to mow and water, rooms to paint.....it will be nice to have something to keep us busy! And of course, I will be getting back into my real estate career as well with a new company, so I am very excited to help people buy a home.
So many things changing in our lives. It is a little scary and a lot exciting. I guess 2011 is really the year for the Frye's. New house, new jobs, new church. Very exciting! :)
1. I drove by our new house we are having built. They are putting the windows in, and then I expect tomorrow, they will be starting the roof. It has gone by so quickly, even though a few weeks ago, it seemed like it was taking forever. In just about 10 weeks, we will be homeowners again. It has been 8 years since we lost our house in Sheridan. The mold caused the problem and it was far too much to fix. So we lost it. Thinking we would never get another house of our own, we resigned to just being renters for a long time. We checked it out a few times, only to be told we needed to get credit cards to get our credit score up to where they wanted it. We said no to credit cards and just assumed we would never get in a house. As a realtor, it is a dream to own your own home. That's my job and when I was helping others buy a home, I felt a little hole inside my heart because I knew I couldn't. It hurt. But that's why I went into real estate, one, I love and have a passion for houses and helping people buy a home. Two, I didn't want someone else to go through what we went through with our first house.
2. I was driving down the road and thought I saw someone I know. Someone that I thought was a friend, but they showed their true colors and caused me a lot of sadness and hurt. I haven't seen or heard from this person since this all went down about 6 months ago, nor do I care to. We moved on and they have moved on and that is fine. I don't wish them ill will or anything, but I don't want to hang out either. My stomach did flips when I saw their car, but after getting a little closer, I found out it wasn't that particular person. I was relieved, and felt a little silly that the thought of seeing this person would cause me such anxiety. Being an introvert, it is hard enough to trust people to get to know me, the real me, and become friends with someone. But, when someone hurts me, I become a mute and hide in my shell. Building up the wall, adding another layer of bricks to try to make it inpenetrable. I forgive, but it is hard to forget when someone hurts you. So, I try to just avoid these people and move on.
3. My son just got his schedule set up for 9th grade. When did this happen?? When did he become a young adult? It seems to have happened right before my eyes and I just didn't pay attention. He is going to turn 14 in May. It doesn't seem like that much time has passed. In four years, my son will be graduating high school and going to college. I am thankful that I have such a wonderful son. God gave me this great kid to raise. He is doing marching band this summer, which Shane and I are very excited about. When he was very young, we decided to let him make his own decisions about extracurricular activities. He could try whatever sport or activity he wanted and make his own decisions about it. He played baseball, basketball, football, karate, but he never fond his competitive side. He loves art and music. He has always like music, but the last few years, he has found his musical side. He came home in 5th grade and announced that he was going to join band, which surprised us, because he was vehemently against band previously. But he starting playing the tuba and enjoyed it and is pretty good at it. He is talented in art as well and I love to see his art when he is done with it and brings it to me. His art teachers have always said he has a natural talent in art. His band teachers have told us he has a natural ability in music as well. I couldn't be more excited about this. I think it is wonderful that he has found his niche. I think he will enjoy marching band a lot, just like Shane and I did. He has decided to go to school to be an archaeologist or a biblical historian. I am so proud.
4. We have been going to College Park Church since September. We love the pastor, we love the sermons, we love the environment there. I hope that this fall, Cameron can get involved in the youth program. He is introverted, like me, and has a hard time getting involved in things. He gets so nervous before, but once he gets into it, he loves it. I just have a hard time getting him to go that first time. I was going to join the bells and choir, but if you keep reading, you will understand why that will be hard. We love the music. Eric, the worship leader, is exactly like our old church's worship leaders. They would mix in some contemporary music with hymns and made it enjoyable for all. Eric is like that and we love the music! Sometimes, when a song starts, Shane and I will look at each other and tears will sometimes glisten in our eyes as we remember singing the same song while we were leading worship. We love it there. Pastor Mark is so good at preaching. I love to listen to his sermons.
5. Here's the reason why I am not going to join bells or choir at this point in time. Shane is changing positions at his company. He will be starting March 1. He will be going into sales, and be leaving for the week to travel to different states in his territory and meeting with the dealers. He will be gone Monday through Friday and have the weekends off. I am actually looking forward to this. Not because I want him to be gone, but because the weekends will be free from texts, phone calls, having to run to the office to do work, etc. we will be able to have dinner with my family or his family or with friends without interruption. He is excited as well for the opportunity to get away from the office and not have all the stress from there. He is so stressed right now and it wears him down. So, he will be going on the road to his 11 state territory and Cameron and I will be here. But, when there are breaks from school, we may go with Shane and hang out with him that week. Originally, we thought about homeschooling so we could go with him more, but I think that will not work out after all. I think Cameron needs the time away from me during the day, especially if it just him and I during the week. I am looking forward to moving into our house so there will be yardwork to keep Cam and I busy, and I will have my front porch to sit on and read in the evenings when it warm, the patio in the backyard to sit down and look around. There are flowers to be planted, a raised bed garden to work in, weeds to pull, grass to mow and water, rooms to paint.....it will be nice to have something to keep us busy! And of course, I will be getting back into my real estate career as well with a new company, so I am very excited to help people buy a home.
So many things changing in our lives. It is a little scary and a lot exciting. I guess 2011 is really the year for the Frye's. New house, new jobs, new church. Very exciting! :)
Friday, January 21, 2011
Does Anybody Hear Her?
This song is by far my favorite Casting Crowns song. It is the first CC song I heard and I fell in love. It speaks so loudly to me. I was that girl that was running the wrong direction, being judged, hurting. People looked down at me like they were better than me. It hurt.
She is running, 100 MPH, in the wrong direction
She is trying but the canyon's ever widening,
In the depths of her cold heart.
So she sets on another misadventure just to find
She's another two years older and she's three more steps behind.
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
Oh does anybody even know she's going down today?
Under the shadow of our steeple with all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
She is yearning for shelter and affection that she never found at home
She is searching for a hero to ride in, to ride in and save the day
And in walks her Prince Charming and he knows just what to say
Momentary lapse of reason and she gives herself away.
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
Oh does anybody even know she's going down today?
Under the shadow of our steeple with all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
If judgement looms under every steeple,
If lofty glances from lofty people
Can't see past her scarlet letter
And we've never even met her
If judgement looms under every steeple
If lofty glances from lofty people
Can't see past her scarlet letter
And we've never even met her
Never even met her!
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
Oh does anybody even know she's going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple with all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her?
Does anybody see?
He is running, 100MPH, in the wrong direction....
So next time you see that girl, or that guy walk into your church or your youth group, don't them for their walk of life at that time. They may have made a mistake, and wants to turn to Jesus for forgiveness, or perhaps they are looking for the reason for that still small voice they hear inside their heart, or maybe they are just needing someone to turn to for help. Don't stick your nose up at them and assume they are bad. Envelop them with the kind of love that Jesus would give them. I know when I was 17, pregnant and scared, I needed people to love me and accept me, but instead I was ridiculed, called names and turned away from. Don't hide in your church and pretend that those people don't exist. Love them. Love them like Jesus.
She is running, 100 MPH, in the wrong direction
She is trying but the canyon's ever widening,
In the depths of her cold heart.
So she sets on another misadventure just to find
She's another two years older and she's three more steps behind.
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
Oh does anybody even know she's going down today?
Under the shadow of our steeple with all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
She is yearning for shelter and affection that she never found at home
She is searching for a hero to ride in, to ride in and save the day
And in walks her Prince Charming and he knows just what to say
Momentary lapse of reason and she gives herself away.
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
Oh does anybody even know she's going down today?
Under the shadow of our steeple with all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
If judgement looms under every steeple,
If lofty glances from lofty people
Can't see past her scarlet letter
And we've never even met her
If judgement looms under every steeple
If lofty glances from lofty people
Can't see past her scarlet letter
And we've never even met her
Never even met her!
Does anybody hear her?
Can anybody see?
Oh does anybody even know she's going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple with all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her?
Does anybody see?
He is running, 100MPH, in the wrong direction....
So next time you see that girl, or that guy walk into your church or your youth group, don't them for their walk of life at that time. They may have made a mistake, and wants to turn to Jesus for forgiveness, or perhaps they are looking for the reason for that still small voice they hear inside their heart, or maybe they are just needing someone to turn to for help. Don't stick your nose up at them and assume they are bad. Envelop them with the kind of love that Jesus would give them. I know when I was 17, pregnant and scared, I needed people to love me and accept me, but instead I was ridiculed, called names and turned away from. Don't hide in your church and pretend that those people don't exist. Love them. Love them like Jesus.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
On The Road...
It's almost 11pm on a snowy, windy Thursday night. I am still up, the house is quiet, dark, Cameron is asleep. Did I mention I am home alone?
Shane accepted a postition within his company as a sales director for an 11 state territory. It hasn't started yet, won't until March 1, but having to go to Louisville, KY to help finish a job his guys started has been a good test as to how well this is going to work. It's not so bad, since for the last 2 1/2 years I have very rarely seen my husband in the evenings, only to have him come home late, and end up asleep on the couch before anyone else even thinks about going to bed. I am used to nonstop phone calls on the weekends, disrupting every opportunity of family time, or having lunch together with people, or going somewhere. Always worrying about whether we will have to make a run to Morristown to get something someone left behind, or make a copy of a paper for someone, or just to go in and get some work that needs to get done. It has been hard. This new position will take him away from home for the week, but home on Friday afternoons and all weekend. No phone calls 24/7. No weekends at the office. The only thing is he is going to be out of the state for the week. But, on breaks from school, we will be able to hop in the car with him and head to different states with him. It will be boring for Cameron and I, but it will mean family time in the car traveling together. I can handle that.
Sleeping by myself in my bed is hard. I am a cold natured person already and Shane is my wall of heat. He snuggles up with me and keeps me warm. Now I will go to bed in a cold empty bed, fending for myself on the warmth. I will make due and will make it work. There are so many positive things about this position, with only a small amount of negative things. I think it will mean more quality time together in the end, because his weekends will be stress free and he will be 100% with us. Not worrying about jobs that are scheduled for the next week, etc.
Our house is coming along finally! They started framing it today! It is getting so close, I can feel it! I am so excited I can't wait! once we move, it will be easier to not worry about Shane on the road, because I will be busy decorating, going to the real estate office to work some days, painting, sitting on my front porch, sipping peppermint tea and reading a good book in the evenings, getting the firepit ready for the weekends, grilling out, meeting our new neighbors. The list goes on and on. If Cameron joins the marching band this summer, I will be busy taking him to practices, picking him up, getting him here and there. I think during the summer, we will go with Shane about once a month. During the school year, it will be only on breaks from school.
So many things change. So quickly things change. I praise God for allowing Shane to have this opportunity to get out from behind the desk and have less stress at his job. I praise God for all the wonderful things in our lives. He is so good to us and we are so undeserving.
Shane accepted a postition within his company as a sales director for an 11 state territory. It hasn't started yet, won't until March 1, but having to go to Louisville, KY to help finish a job his guys started has been a good test as to how well this is going to work. It's not so bad, since for the last 2 1/2 years I have very rarely seen my husband in the evenings, only to have him come home late, and end up asleep on the couch before anyone else even thinks about going to bed. I am used to nonstop phone calls on the weekends, disrupting every opportunity of family time, or having lunch together with people, or going somewhere. Always worrying about whether we will have to make a run to Morristown to get something someone left behind, or make a copy of a paper for someone, or just to go in and get some work that needs to get done. It has been hard. This new position will take him away from home for the week, but home on Friday afternoons and all weekend. No phone calls 24/7. No weekends at the office. The only thing is he is going to be out of the state for the week. But, on breaks from school, we will be able to hop in the car with him and head to different states with him. It will be boring for Cameron and I, but it will mean family time in the car traveling together. I can handle that.
Sleeping by myself in my bed is hard. I am a cold natured person already and Shane is my wall of heat. He snuggles up with me and keeps me warm. Now I will go to bed in a cold empty bed, fending for myself on the warmth. I will make due and will make it work. There are so many positive things about this position, with only a small amount of negative things. I think it will mean more quality time together in the end, because his weekends will be stress free and he will be 100% with us. Not worrying about jobs that are scheduled for the next week, etc.
Our house is coming along finally! They started framing it today! It is getting so close, I can feel it! I am so excited I can't wait! once we move, it will be easier to not worry about Shane on the road, because I will be busy decorating, going to the real estate office to work some days, painting, sitting on my front porch, sipping peppermint tea and reading a good book in the evenings, getting the firepit ready for the weekends, grilling out, meeting our new neighbors. The list goes on and on. If Cameron joins the marching band this summer, I will be busy taking him to practices, picking him up, getting him here and there. I think during the summer, we will go with Shane about once a month. During the school year, it will be only on breaks from school.
So many things change. So quickly things change. I praise God for allowing Shane to have this opportunity to get out from behind the desk and have less stress at his job. I praise God for all the wonderful things in our lives. He is so good to us and we are so undeserving.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
14 years ago.
The snow had fallen all night, the snow emergencies were out. Blizzard warnings were posted. Shane's car was still stuck in the drift down the road from the night before trying to get to the rehearsal dinner. Some people couldn't come to the wedding because of the weather. The church was out in the country and the roads were barely plowed. My dad's truck barely made it through. My hair was done, my maid of honor was in the truck with us and we went on our slick, snow covered way to the church. I was 5 months pregnant, nervous and scared, excited but anxious. Food was being prepared, cake was being delivered, all was in place.
The reason we got married in the middle of the winter was because I wanted us to be married as close to the one year mark as possible. We started dating the year before on January 12th. But that was a Sunday, so we settled for the 11th. I didn't want to wait until after Cameron was born, I wanted to be married before.
I walked into the church and looked into the sanctuary. Flowers were set, photographer was there to take pictures. Cake was downstairs in the basement along with sandwiches and other food that was ready to be served. It was all surreal. I was only 17 years old, pregnant and scared to death. I knew what I was getting into, but it still scared me a little.
As I stood outside the sanctuary doors with my dad, I heard the song being sung and then the music started. I made my way down the aisle with my daddy. He looked at me with tears in his eyes as we walked towards Shane. As dad gave me away to Shane, I saw my soon to be father in law standing there preparing to marry us, kleenex in hand, tears in his eyes. With all the snow, the aisles were full and there were people standing in the back. I remember nothing about the ceremony except that the unity candle wouldn't light and I started crying because I thought it meant that our marriage wouldn't never last. I laugh now. After the ceremony we went downstairs and celebrated.
I sit here 14 years later and look back on that day. Our lives began then, but they only got stronger the longer we have been together. God sent me Shane. I believe He sends someone for every person out there. Shane is my soulmate and I was so lucky to find him as young as I did. I wouldn't go back and change a thing. I am so glad I married him and had Cameron. My life began then. We may have been young and clueless, but we have grown up together and I think raised a pretty great kid.
Thank you God, for leading me to my soulmate and giving us our son. May our love grow stronger every day for each other. My heart swells with love.
The reason we got married in the middle of the winter was because I wanted us to be married as close to the one year mark as possible. We started dating the year before on January 12th. But that was a Sunday, so we settled for the 11th. I didn't want to wait until after Cameron was born, I wanted to be married before.
I walked into the church and looked into the sanctuary. Flowers were set, photographer was there to take pictures. Cake was downstairs in the basement along with sandwiches and other food that was ready to be served. It was all surreal. I was only 17 years old, pregnant and scared to death. I knew what I was getting into, but it still scared me a little.
As I stood outside the sanctuary doors with my dad, I heard the song being sung and then the music started. I made my way down the aisle with my daddy. He looked at me with tears in his eyes as we walked towards Shane. As dad gave me away to Shane, I saw my soon to be father in law standing there preparing to marry us, kleenex in hand, tears in his eyes. With all the snow, the aisles were full and there were people standing in the back. I remember nothing about the ceremony except that the unity candle wouldn't light and I started crying because I thought it meant that our marriage wouldn't never last. I laugh now. After the ceremony we went downstairs and celebrated.
I sit here 14 years later and look back on that day. Our lives began then, but they only got stronger the longer we have been together. God sent me Shane. I believe He sends someone for every person out there. Shane is my soulmate and I was so lucky to find him as young as I did. I wouldn't go back and change a thing. I am so glad I married him and had Cameron. My life began then. We may have been young and clueless, but we have grown up together and I think raised a pretty great kid.
Thank you God, for leading me to my soulmate and giving us our son. May our love grow stronger every day for each other. My heart swells with love.
Saturday, January 8, 2011
New Opportunities.
Shane and I made a decision a while back to take on leading Sunday School worship. At the time, it seemed like a great idea, but the amount of work didn't after we got into it. So we politely withdrew ourselves from that.
Tuesday, I start handbells. Oh how I have missed playing bells. I was the director of the bells at our old church and loved it so much, but I missed actually playing. Directing is okay, but playing is so much more fun to me. Shane used to play bells too, but he isn't going to be involved this time. I decided I can do this by myself and put myself out there. I usually am behind in the shadow of Shane when we get involved in things, and that is perfectly fine with me. But he doesn't have the time to do anything right now, so it is just me, by myself.
I can honestly say there is a little bit of fear inside me as I think of going to this huge church by myself on Tuesday nights and spending time with these people whom I have never met. I know it will be fine and I will probably make some nice friends, but the first time will be hard for me.
We have both talked about getting involved with the choir as well, but I don't know that Shane will be able to do that either with his schedule and the possibilities of his job changing sometime soon. So I am on my own again. Not sure if I want to get that involved right now, I think I may start small, going to bells and doing that for the Easter season, then see where we are at and go from there.
I can't wait for bells on Tuesday, but I can. I am very nervous but excited. We never know what the future will hold....we just go with it and see what God is going to do!!
Tuesday, I start handbells. Oh how I have missed playing bells. I was the director of the bells at our old church and loved it so much, but I missed actually playing. Directing is okay, but playing is so much more fun to me. Shane used to play bells too, but he isn't going to be involved this time. I decided I can do this by myself and put myself out there. I usually am behind in the shadow of Shane when we get involved in things, and that is perfectly fine with me. But he doesn't have the time to do anything right now, so it is just me, by myself.
I can honestly say there is a little bit of fear inside me as I think of going to this huge church by myself on Tuesday nights and spending time with these people whom I have never met. I know it will be fine and I will probably make some nice friends, but the first time will be hard for me.
We have both talked about getting involved with the choir as well, but I don't know that Shane will be able to do that either with his schedule and the possibilities of his job changing sometime soon. So I am on my own again. Not sure if I want to get that involved right now, I think I may start small, going to bells and doing that for the Easter season, then see where we are at and go from there.
I can't wait for bells on Tuesday, but I can. I am very nervous but excited. We never know what the future will hold....we just go with it and see what God is going to do!!
Friday, January 7, 2011
The Melting Pot = Delicious!
Yum!!
Shane and I went to The Melting Pot tonight for dinner. I was hesitant because I am not one of those types of people that will eat just anything. I am extremely picky eater and tend to shy away from places that forces me to try something new. But, because it was a special occasion, I went with it and made the reservation. It was a great choice!
We had the fiesta cheese fondue and it was pretty tasty, and I had a caesar salad and it was fantastic! We had different meats and the caribbean oil to cook the meat in and it was great. But the best thing was the teriyaki glaze that they give you to dip your meat in. YUM!! I actually splurged and bought a bottle because it was that good. Dessert was a definite highlight as well. We had a chocolate turtle flambe'. It had milk chocolate, caramel and pecans and they flambeed' it. It was delicious!!!!!
All in all, it was wonderful night, where Shane and I got to get away and do something nice by ourselves and love on each other. With the busyness of life, sometimes you forget to make special time for each other, and while we are very close and amke time for each other, we tend to not get away and do special things like this very often. It was definitely a great date and I look forward to spending many many more with him. He is the love of my life. <3
Shane and I went to The Melting Pot tonight for dinner. I was hesitant because I am not one of those types of people that will eat just anything. I am extremely picky eater and tend to shy away from places that forces me to try something new. But, because it was a special occasion, I went with it and made the reservation. It was a great choice!
We had the fiesta cheese fondue and it was pretty tasty, and I had a caesar salad and it was fantastic! We had different meats and the caribbean oil to cook the meat in and it was great. But the best thing was the teriyaki glaze that they give you to dip your meat in. YUM!! I actually splurged and bought a bottle because it was that good. Dessert was a definite highlight as well. We had a chocolate turtle flambe'. It had milk chocolate, caramel and pecans and they flambeed' it. It was delicious!!!!!
All in all, it was wonderful night, where Shane and I got to get away and do something nice by ourselves and love on each other. With the busyness of life, sometimes you forget to make special time for each other, and while we are very close and amke time for each other, we tend to not get away and do special things like this very often. It was definitely a great date and I look forward to spending many many more with him. He is the love of my life. <3
Thursday, January 6, 2011
14 years.......already?
Tuesday, January 11th is our anniversary.
14 years married. Wow. Obviously, the longest relationship either of us have ever been in.
We dated for one year before we got married. So technically, we have been together for 15 years. That's almost half my life!!
Our married relationship started off rocky. We had no money, I was 5 months pregnant and we lived with my parents and grandparents. Not so exciting for a newlywed young married couple.
We have made many mistakes and fought and screamed and gotten angry with each other. But all in all, we have a wonderful relationship. It was hard the first few years, but later on in our relationship as we got older and wiser and grew up a little, it was much easier to compromise and work together on our marriage.
The older we get, the more we learn about each other.
Tomorrow we are going out for our anniversary. Last year we went to Doubletree Suites where we went on our wedding night. This year, we are going out to a nice dinner at the Melting Pot, where they will have a table waiting for us that has a card with our anniversary on it. Romantic, huh? The we are going to the fashion mall and walk around and then head home. I am a total hopeless romantic. I am like Noah in The Notebook. Complete romantic.
So, January 11, Shane and I will celebrate 14 years of blissful married life.
Happy Aniversary Shane, I love you more than words can express.......
14 years married. Wow. Obviously, the longest relationship either of us have ever been in.
We dated for one year before we got married. So technically, we have been together for 15 years. That's almost half my life!!
Our married relationship started off rocky. We had no money, I was 5 months pregnant and we lived with my parents and grandparents. Not so exciting for a newlywed young married couple.
We have made many mistakes and fought and screamed and gotten angry with each other. But all in all, we have a wonderful relationship. It was hard the first few years, but later on in our relationship as we got older and wiser and grew up a little, it was much easier to compromise and work together on our marriage.
The older we get, the more we learn about each other.
Tomorrow we are going out for our anniversary. Last year we went to Doubletree Suites where we went on our wedding night. This year, we are going out to a nice dinner at the Melting Pot, where they will have a table waiting for us that has a card with our anniversary on it. Romantic, huh? The we are going to the fashion mall and walk around and then head home. I am a total hopeless romantic. I am like Noah in The Notebook. Complete romantic.
So, January 11, Shane and I will celebrate 14 years of blissful married life.
Happy Aniversary Shane, I love you more than words can express.......
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
2011: The Year Of A New..... Me....??
I spent 2010 basically wondering what the heck was going on!
Our church was in crisis, our world was turned upside down and we thought it was bad. Shane got a promotion at work and his crazy hours went from bad to worse. We left our church, came back, then left again. We found a new church home. We got two new nieces within a month of each other. Times were a changing.
As I sit here this evening, it is coming up on 10pm and I am reflecting on the last year's troubles and joys. Sometimes we look back on the last year and realize that God does everything for a reason. Taking us out of the comfort zone at our church and turning the world upside down for us, and then putting people in place that would challenge us. Inevitably, causing us to leave our home. The first time we left, we didn't feel confident as to where God was leading us and ended up right back where we started, back to home, where it was comfortable. But, it wasn't comfortable. It was hard and hurtful and feelings got hurt in the process. So we really felt like God was telling us this isn't where our home is anymore. We visited College Park with my in laws and fell in love with the music and the sermons. Crosses are all around you, Jesus is mentioned on everyone's tongues. It is established and home to Shane's family, and it was fitting that it has become home to us as well. Mark, the Pastor, is a wonderful Pastor, he has wonderful sermons saturated with scripture and challenges us every week to be better Christians. We sing some contemporary songs, as well as some old hymns. It is a wonderful balance for everyone there. I see people that are young enjoying the music and I see very old people swaying to the hymns, but all in all, it is balanced. I feel like there are so many churches out there, some that we have visited, that tend to try and pull the younger population in by "secularizing" (this may be a made up word...not sure) their services. Loud music, rockin' out to more secular songs, sputtering "sermons" that you just need to feel good about yourself for being at church and not throw too much Jesus talk in there, so as to not offend some people. I am sorry, but to me, that is not church. Taking all the crosses out of sight, not really talking about Jesus, taking all religion out of the whole "church" experience doesn't sit well with me. I want to go to church and listen to a flowing sermon full of scriptures, speak to me about Jesus, who He was, who He is and who we want to emulate. Don't teach the children to persevere or how to love one another, teach them bible stories and have VBS and let them hear the stories of the bible that could influence their life someday. I yearn for that type of church experience and have found it. Have handbells ringing in the welcome area as you come to Christmas service and have the full choir up there singing praise to the Holy God and the resurrected Christ on Easter. Don't take all those things out of our churches, because while you may be trying to pull in the non-believers, you are inevitably shooing away and spitting in the face of the believers that have called these churches home for many years. It has to stop!
Sorry for my soapbox ramblings, I am getting tired and when that happens, I tend to go off on tangents.
This is a year for change in our family. We are at a new church, and starting to get involved. We are building a house and closing sometime in April, we are seriously contemplating pulling Cameron out of public school to go to either Christian Prep HS or homeschool online through a Christian based homeschool. Shane is looking at changing jobs at some point, I am finally getting back into my own career in real estate. We are getting serious about our health and focusing on our exercise and healthy living. Mentally, I had to go through and delete people in my life that either are not my true friends, or have shunned me for some reason or another. I have to delete the poisonous toxic people that rot my mind and spew forth their garbage in my life. I have no time to deal with people and their drama, nor do I want to take part in it or be reminded of it day in and day out. I have wiped most of the people we used to attend church with. I have to fully cut ties or else be reminded of the fact that we can't go back to the way things were. I kept only those people who have made it known that they truly care about me and my family. Acquaintences went away. I may be called immature or childish behind my back, but that is fine. I don't have anything to be ashamed of. I am not running away, I am stepping forward into the light and letting God tell me where He wants me to go.
My goal for this year, is to pray harder, and more often. To focus on God more. To get my spiritual life back to where it was over a year ago. The tears have dried and the future is upon us, so it is time to step out of the darkness and let God back in in full force! Praise be to God for all things in this world and for giving me a renewed spirit in Him. I pray for all my fellow Christians out there that have been in the darkness in the last year and for the ones that have had a renewal of spirit in the last year. I pray that God will heal you of your sorrows, and that you will praise Him in good times. Pray hard and pray often. Pray for your pastor and his family. Pray for your coworkers and boss. Pray for your country and the people running it. PRAY PRAY PRAY!
Let me close my blog tonight by saying this: Please remember that this is my personal blog, and I openly share these thoughts with you. If you don't like what I have said, please know that these opinions are just that: opinions. I gladly hear other people's opinions on their blogs and whether or not I agree doesn't matter. What matters is that we all are different and we all have opinions and this being my blog, it is my opinion that gets posted here. Feel free to comment if you want to tell me your thoughts. I have no problem sharing my feelings if you want to discuss.
Happy 2011 everyone! May God guide your heart this year.
Our church was in crisis, our world was turned upside down and we thought it was bad. Shane got a promotion at work and his crazy hours went from bad to worse. We left our church, came back, then left again. We found a new church home. We got two new nieces within a month of each other. Times were a changing.
As I sit here this evening, it is coming up on 10pm and I am reflecting on the last year's troubles and joys. Sometimes we look back on the last year and realize that God does everything for a reason. Taking us out of the comfort zone at our church and turning the world upside down for us, and then putting people in place that would challenge us. Inevitably, causing us to leave our home. The first time we left, we didn't feel confident as to where God was leading us and ended up right back where we started, back to home, where it was comfortable. But, it wasn't comfortable. It was hard and hurtful and feelings got hurt in the process. So we really felt like God was telling us this isn't where our home is anymore. We visited College Park with my in laws and fell in love with the music and the sermons. Crosses are all around you, Jesus is mentioned on everyone's tongues. It is established and home to Shane's family, and it was fitting that it has become home to us as well. Mark, the Pastor, is a wonderful Pastor, he has wonderful sermons saturated with scripture and challenges us every week to be better Christians. We sing some contemporary songs, as well as some old hymns. It is a wonderful balance for everyone there. I see people that are young enjoying the music and I see very old people swaying to the hymns, but all in all, it is balanced. I feel like there are so many churches out there, some that we have visited, that tend to try and pull the younger population in by "secularizing" (this may be a made up word...not sure) their services. Loud music, rockin' out to more secular songs, sputtering "sermons" that you just need to feel good about yourself for being at church and not throw too much Jesus talk in there, so as to not offend some people. I am sorry, but to me, that is not church. Taking all the crosses out of sight, not really talking about Jesus, taking all religion out of the whole "church" experience doesn't sit well with me. I want to go to church and listen to a flowing sermon full of scriptures, speak to me about Jesus, who He was, who He is and who we want to emulate. Don't teach the children to persevere or how to love one another, teach them bible stories and have VBS and let them hear the stories of the bible that could influence their life someday. I yearn for that type of church experience and have found it. Have handbells ringing in the welcome area as you come to Christmas service and have the full choir up there singing praise to the Holy God and the resurrected Christ on Easter. Don't take all those things out of our churches, because while you may be trying to pull in the non-believers, you are inevitably shooing away and spitting in the face of the believers that have called these churches home for many years. It has to stop!
Sorry for my soapbox ramblings, I am getting tired and when that happens, I tend to go off on tangents.
This is a year for change in our family. We are at a new church, and starting to get involved. We are building a house and closing sometime in April, we are seriously contemplating pulling Cameron out of public school to go to either Christian Prep HS or homeschool online through a Christian based homeschool. Shane is looking at changing jobs at some point, I am finally getting back into my own career in real estate. We are getting serious about our health and focusing on our exercise and healthy living. Mentally, I had to go through and delete people in my life that either are not my true friends, or have shunned me for some reason or another. I have to delete the poisonous toxic people that rot my mind and spew forth their garbage in my life. I have no time to deal with people and their drama, nor do I want to take part in it or be reminded of it day in and day out. I have wiped most of the people we used to attend church with. I have to fully cut ties or else be reminded of the fact that we can't go back to the way things were. I kept only those people who have made it known that they truly care about me and my family. Acquaintences went away. I may be called immature or childish behind my back, but that is fine. I don't have anything to be ashamed of. I am not running away, I am stepping forward into the light and letting God tell me where He wants me to go.
My goal for this year, is to pray harder, and more often. To focus on God more. To get my spiritual life back to where it was over a year ago. The tears have dried and the future is upon us, so it is time to step out of the darkness and let God back in in full force! Praise be to God for all things in this world and for giving me a renewed spirit in Him. I pray for all my fellow Christians out there that have been in the darkness in the last year and for the ones that have had a renewal of spirit in the last year. I pray that God will heal you of your sorrows, and that you will praise Him in good times. Pray hard and pray often. Pray for your pastor and his family. Pray for your coworkers and boss. Pray for your country and the people running it. PRAY PRAY PRAY!
Let me close my blog tonight by saying this: Please remember that this is my personal blog, and I openly share these thoughts with you. If you don't like what I have said, please know that these opinions are just that: opinions. I gladly hear other people's opinions on their blogs and whether or not I agree doesn't matter. What matters is that we all are different and we all have opinions and this being my blog, it is my opinion that gets posted here. Feel free to comment if you want to tell me your thoughts. I have no problem sharing my feelings if you want to discuss.
Happy 2011 everyone! May God guide your heart this year.
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